Column: Outside Looking In

In the summer of 1995, I worked a three month internship at The Warroad Pioneer, which I'm sorry to say has since ceased operation. This was the first professional newspaper that I worked for in my career, and it turned out to be a wonderful experience. I had only worked at Bemidji State University's newspaper for about a year and half before landing the internship. At The Pioneer I gained experience in sports, feature, beat and government reporting. I designed pages, took and developed photographs and was responsible for community relations. The best part is that I remain friends with the owners nearly 30 years later.

July 4, 1995

By Devlyn Brooks

You ever have one of those days where you just didn't want to get up, and there isn't really a spectacular reason for it? It just feels like some cosmic force is sitting right on your head, holding you down.

You're just lying there after the alarm has gone off, and you think, "I'm not going to get out of bed. I'm just not."

Your body is agreeing with you too. It does not want to get up, either. When your mind says, "Alright legs, swing over the edge of the bed." They just lay there, right? Well, when you do manage to get your legs slung over the edge, you realize that your torso also must follow, and so you try to sit up.

Swinging your legs over the edge is a piece of cake compared to sitting up. Ten minutes have now passed since your alarm went off and you realize that if you don't get your rear in gear, you'll be late.

That is when you begin shuffling toward the shower. You know the one where your head is hanging, and your feet are draggin' because you don't want to get up. You would pout to someone, if only there were someone to pout to. You haven't shuffled this bad since the time when your mom wouldn't let you have the candy bar when you were 6.

Each step brings you closer to the shower and a step farther from your bed. You make it to the bathroom. You reach in to turn the hot water knob on the shower, and you sit down on the toilet to wait for the hot water to come.

That's when you realize the mistake of sitting down. You feel like you could fall asleep right there on your toilet. With sheer will power you haul yourself into the shower.

This is when the other realization hits you. It has now passed that point at which it is too late to turn around. You can't go back to bed. Oh sure, you could dry off and then hit the sack again, but it's just not the same. So, what is the use? No, you're up for the day.

After sticking your finger in your eye while washing your hair, you crawl out of the shower wet, cold and miserable. You're looking for your towel which happens to still be in the hall closet where you forgot it.

You step out dripping over everything and manage to get a towel while leaving only a small lake in the hallway. You start wiping your face only to find out that you grabbed a dish towel.

At this point, it has now been 40 minutes since your alarm went off and you know you will be late unless you speed up.

You rush through the brushing of your teeth, the rinsing of your mouth, the combing of your hair and you're finally ready to get dressed.

Heading back to the bedroom to get dressed you stub your toe on the bed. You cuss and swear at the idiot (you) who left a stupid thing like a bed right in the middle of the bedroom.

You proceed to put on your clothes, breaking the button on your pants and misbuttoning your shirt. You decide to fix your pants with a belt because changing them would just be too much work, and you might have the temptation to get back in bed once half-way undressed. The shirt you decide you'll fix later in the car on the way to work. Now for your shoes. "Shoes, where are my shoes? I just had 'em yesterday. Who stole my shoes?" (Like anyone would want them.)

On your way to the front closet to find your shoes, you step in that puddle that you left when you were getting your towel. Now, in wet socks, you stomp toward the closet only to find one of your shoes. ... The other is not there.

You glance at your watch, which shows that if you would have left five minutes ago, you'd still be late.

You finally find your other shoe, and you're on your way to work with no button your pants, your shirt's buttoned wrong and your socks are wet. It's going to be a wonderful day, isn't it?

You might have guessed that I had one of those days this week. In fact, it was Thursday, June 29. It all happened to me. I'm not joking; I didn't remember to fix my shirt until after I had already helped a customer at the cash register. I hope they didn't notice.

Maybe I should have listened to my instincts and just gone back to bed.